Are you a bride or newlywed ready to embark on the journey of finding your perfect wedding dress? We’ve got you covered with this ultimate guide to make your shopping experience as smooth as possible. Some of this advice you may start to recognize as common practice but I’m certain we’ve got some tough love and real talk happening on this list that others might not be telling you.

1. Start Early

Give yourself plenty of time. Ideally, start shopping 9-12 months before your wedding. What most people don’t realize is that when you are ordering a dress from a shop, it can take up to 9 months to deliver because that dress is literally made when the bridal shop orders it for you. The majority of design houses do NOT stock sizes that are ready for shipment. See our previous article about key terms when wedding dress shopping.  

[Things are different when you are shopping off-the-rack or second-hand because you can take the item from the shop right away. Take note if items need cleaning, restoration or mending in advance as these processes can also take a lot of time and impact the final cost.]

2. Do Your Homework

Before hitting the boutiques, spend some time researching wedding dress styles that you like. Save pictures and make a mood board. This helps you (and your consultant) get a clearer idea of what you’re looking for. You will be surprised with how quickly patterns emerge from this even if it feels like you’re all over the place. 

3. Set a Budget… or Two

Know your budget before you start shopping, even if you are going to have wiggle room. Remember to factor in costs for alterations, special customizations, as well as accessories such as a veil, etc. This will help a good sales consultant to better guide you through the process and what it means specifically in your price range. 

Here are a few quick notes about additional costs that could come up during your wedding dress search…

• Rush Fees- varies from designer to designer based on how long it takes to cut and sew the garment.
• Additional length fee- Typically if you are over 5’7-5’9 and planning to wear heels, you may need extra length.
• Custom or specialty sizing fee – ie split sizing, petite, etc. It should also be mentioned the some designers upcharge for plus sizing- yes that’s f*cking rude but just be aware.
• Alterations fee- there can be a rush fee here too as well as charges for fittings or additional services like packaging and pressing, etc.
• Storage fees- if you can’t bring your items home from the shop promptly you might pay to have them kept at the boutique.
• Gratuity- if you feel you received outstanding service along the way, you might like to add gratuity, which is never expected but  always appreciated.

4. Book Appointments

It is standard practice that most bridal boutiques require appointments, so make sure to book in advance. This ensures you get the attention and time you deserve.

5. Bring Your Besties, Not the Whole Town

It’s fun to have a hype crowd with you when you start trying on wedding attire, but we beg you – only bring a few of your closest friends or family. I have seen it time and time again when differing opinions ruin a bride’s or nearlyweds shopping experience- yes, even family members can’t help themselves sometimes.  Limit it to a few people whose opinions you value the most to avoid getting overwhelmed.

6. Keep an Open Mind

You might have a specific idea in mind, but be open to trying on different styles suggested by your consultant. Allow them to pull a wildcard for you based on their knowledge of the stores wedding dresses and styles. You might be surprised by what looks great on you and you’ll have a little more fun along the way! (I mean, how often do you get to go wedding dress shopping?!)

7. Only Shop Around a Little

We get it, this process is exciting and always starts out fun, but it’s SO common these days to shop around excessively and it only makes things hard on you. The biggest issue is creating decision paralysis and pure overwhelm because of the amount of options out there. There is no need to try on 100 dresses that have similar ideas- you will get confused and it will cost you time and energy and maybe extra money too. 

No one will know the dresses you didn’t choose, they only see what you selected as the most special, so lean into that and feel empowered to trust your gut.

8. Speaking of TRUST YOUR GUT…

Trust your instincts and don’t feel pressured to make a decision on the spot. It IS OKAY to step away, try another shop or just sleep on it- just don’t sleep for THAT long alright?! 

And to the opposite end- it’s okay if ‘the one’ is the first thing you try on or the polar opposite of what you thought you’d love. If it makes YOU feel fantastic, that’s all you need to know.

9. Sometimes the moment isn’t the MOMENT 

People often say “You’ll know when you’ve found ‘the one’.” and for 95% of people that tends to be true, but it is also totally normal to not have that rush of overwhelm that makes things feel like resounding YES to the dress moment and that’s okay too. Trust thy gut and know thyself. If you’re not that type of person, then you’re not that type of person- and we still think you’re pretty cool (wink).  

It’s totally fine to think shopping for wedding attire isn’t the colossus experience the tv shows tell you it should be. Lean into what feels good to you and whatever allows you the ability to continue to make decisions you feel solid about. 

…BUT you do need to make a decision, haha!

10. Dates are Important

Sounds obvious right? For us in the wedding industry we live and die by the calendar, so you don’t have to lie to us about your wedding date and say it’s earlier than it really is( yes this still happens). When you’ve hired the right people, we got you, we just need to know when the big day is.

Also, if you’re a traveling couple, please always tell everyone both your wedding date and your TRAVEL date! Pros and vendors will sometimes need to work off of your departure date so be sure to share that info up front. 

11. Enjoy the Process

Most importantly, enjoy the process! This is a once-in-a-lifetime experience, so have fun and cherish the memories you’re making.

Happy shopping, and here’s to finding your perfect wedding fit or dream dress!

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Hi, I’m Melissa, the sassy sewing and wedding pro you didn’t know you needed in your life. 

I’m the owner of deMelis Atelier, a top ranked alterations studio located in Connecticut, and the founder of Stitched Collective, a community for sewing professionals. I’m a master seamstress and wedding dress educator as well as an industry leader and trainer… and a lover of spicy mango margaritas.

I use my fashion and sewing knowledge to help brides and wedding pros alike. 

Be sure to check out my latest endeavors and access some of my favorite products too!